lessons to be learnt

                                                       Lessons to be  learnt

(My article published in alive magazine , July-2015  issue )

Indian women of all ages should learn to do and not to do certain things if they want to live and die  with dignity in this great country called India (According to the mind set of many Indians)

Don’t do  list .

• Girls of all ages should reach home before sunset ,. That means ,they should not participate in events other than their academic  duties

• They should not  have  carrier ambition  so that they will not be  not exposed to any dangers waiting in the work places.  That means, they should not  aim to achieve something in their life through  making use of the knowledge they  have  gained through their higher or professional education.

• They all should dress up like senior women and should not  wear make up . That means ,they refrain from  attracting any man through their colourful and trendy dresses and invite dangers of sexual harassment.

• They should get married as early as possible .That means ,the responsibility of  security and safety of girls can be shifted to a robust young men from aged fathers.

• They  should not use any public or private vehicle or  lift or subway when they are alone. That means , always move with a crowd or wait till a crowd gathers.

•  They  should learn to be docile and not exhibit their intelligence or smartness even if they happen to be working in a 9-5 job . That  means, they can protect themselves from the envy or irritation and anger of  their male colleagues and thereby escape  from dangerous attack on their  .dignity

• They should never work hard to reach certain ambitious goals in their professional life  That means, they will be spared  from character assassination.

•  If they are economically constrained to take up a job , they should opt only for teaching Job  and that too in girls schools  or colleges .

• They should not think of any life in the out side world . That ,means they are born to be a good wife and mother ,doing only the wifely and motherly duties.

• They should never think or talk of women’s empowerment or economic independence  or freedom or gender equality . That  means they should be prepared to live with the ideology 18^th century women who were satisfied with their suffering in silence attitude. in spite of denial of basic rights . 

Do list.

The girls who are born with independent sprit, sense of gender justice , intelligence , wisdom and equipped with knowledge gained through  higher education and specialised professional ,skills are not willing to confine themselves to the traditional womanly duties . Such women do take up carriers  for achieving their life goals. Though they know about the difficulties of juggling  between home and carrier managements . They have to follow certain precautions.

They are –

·        Acquiring skills  in self defense methods, carrying a pepper spray or a long pin and  a cell phone with balance in account and with  help line numbers   in their hand bags.

·        Entrusting  young daughters in the care of any men however close they are in relationship and friendship should be avoided .

·         Equipping themselves with legal awareness so that they will be familiar with the provisions and  recourse to women protection laws.

·        Moving  away from  unsafe environment  abruptly even if it will look non  courteous .

·        Remaining  very cautious with  men who are totally strangers and avoid giving personal details.

·         Avoiding  the company of social drinkers even if it is part of   official life.

·        Following  all types of security measures while remaining  active in the social media.

·        Seeking  the help of women support groups when targeted  with sexual threats.

·        Taking family members into confidence if caught in sexual harassment situation

·         Giving police complaint immediately after sexual offence irrespective of the position of the offender  and keeping all the evidences in tact .

          

But we have to admit that  the growing crimes against  women have placed India with a 4th rank among countries in the matter of unsafe environment for women . It is sad commentary on our culture. India is now known as country with  no respect for the need for gender justice. Many number of women would come forward to complain about sex related crimes without fear or favour, only when, trials are conducted speedily and verdict announced within 6 months.